Remakes and The Death of Hollywood

As I've mentioned before on this blog, when I was a kid my mom used to take me to the movies every Sunday afternoon. She did this for several years. From about 1982 to 1986. This was back when movies were still cheap, and I could still get in under a child's ticket price. I saw a lot of crap, but I saw a lot of good movies too, and some of those movies still bring back some fond memories.

Over the years, from what I presume is because Hollywood has completely run out of ideas, they are remaking many of my favorite movies from the 80's. Just recently I saw two remakes of movies that I really loved as a kid: "Conan the Barbarian" (from 1982) and "Fright Night" (from 1985). Last year, another one of my favorite 80's movies, "Clash of the Titans", was also remade. And in October of this year, we have a remake of the John Carpenter classic "The Thing" coming out. This is after the totally crappy remakes of other classic Carpenter movies that have preceded it, like "The Fog" and "Halloween."

While "Conan" and "Fright Night" (the remakes) had a few cool scenes here and there, for the most part, they sucked. While some would argue that the original "Conan", with Arnold Schwarzenegger, is hardly a classic, I like it a lot. I also think it still holds up well today, unlike "Fright Night" and "Clash", which definitely look like the products of the 80's that they are. Both the new "Conan" and the old one are basically simple revenge stories. But the original had that great score, sweeping landscapes, and a story that took its time and allowed you to know the characters, and to feel the triumph when Conan finally kills his enemies at the end of the film. The new one is just one battle scene after another with fake CGI blood flying everywhere.

Hollywood should really give up this remake trend. They rarely work, and most of the time they tank at the box office (both "Conan" and "Fright Night" bombed). For every decent remake that comes out (Dawn of the Dead, King Kong (2005), Scarface (1983), The Thing (1982), you get tons of crap remakes (Psycho, The Omen, Arthur, Fame, The Fog, Friday the 13th, Halloween, House of Wax, Rollerball, The Wolfman, The Wicker Man, etc.) I'm sure I've only just scraped the surface here.

And more are on the way, including the previously mentioned update of "The Thing" and "Total Recall", with Colin Farell taking over Schwarzenegger's role. Although they haven't been announced, I'm fully expecting to see remakes of "Jaws" and "Star Wars" in my lifetime. "Star Wars", with all its ridiculous changes made by George Lucas, is practically a remake now anyway. With the blu-ray release of the 6 Star Wars movies coming out on September 16th, I see that Lucas has added some new dialogue to "Return of the Jedi." During the climactic scene where The Emperor is killing Luke, Darth Vader now shouts "No! Nooooo!"

(Here's a link to the video):

http://youtu.be/27RVJJfny4I

What the hell, Lucas???? First you've got Greedo firing first in the Cantina, now Vader shouting "Nooo!" at one of the most emotional scenes in the original trilogy?? I'm hoping that when Lucas dies, someone goes in and fixes all this crap.

Ok, I realize I'm sounding like a Star Wars fanboy geek, but this is the equivalent of Paul McCartney going back to the original recording of "Hey Jude", adding a Kanye West rap section in the middle, and then never releasing the original version again.

The Golden Age of Hollywood is long gone, my friends. Everything is now about marketing, demographics, and catering to the lowest common denominator. A filmmaker like Stanley Kubrick would be box office poison today. A five minute scene of dialogue would now have to have at least one explosion in the middle (in 3D, of course). It's no wonder so many kids have ADD nowadays.

I haven't completely given up on movies. Occasionally, you'll get a classic every once in a while. Steven Speilberg, Woody Allen, Martin Scorcese, The Coen Brothers, Quentin Tarantino, Terence Malick, Christopher Nolan, and Ridley Scott are still making movies. But in 2011, finding a good movie is as elusive as finding a trustworthy politician.

Ramblings #11

Thought I'd share this video I saw the other day from Jon Stewart on "Class Warfare."

It made me laugh more than once, particularly the comment about the "poor" owning refrigerators.

Sadly, however, everything he says rings true. The poor have always been (and will always be) screwed over by the rich.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
World of Class Warfare - The Poor's Free Ride Is Over
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog The Daily Show on Facebook

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A little over a week ago, Texas governor Rick Perry officially announced that he is running for president.

I held off on commenting about it, thinking maybe it was a joke. Sadly, it isn't.

Seriously, have we not learned our lesson about electing Texas Governors as President?

Much of Perry's success has been to lure companies to Texas with promises of huge tax breaks and lax regulations.

How could he repeat that all across the country? It's just not possible.

I honestly can't see Perry (or Bachmann either, for that matter) getting past the primaries.

I think the best hope for the Republicans is going to be Mitt Romney.

Romney isn't that great either, but seems to be the only "sane" candidate in the GOP field.

Crazy From the Heat

I'm having difficulty adapting to this heat in Texas. I just looked at the 10 day forecast for Austin: 103, 106, 106, 105, 104, 104, 103, 104, 104, 104. No clouds. No rain. Just blistering, insane heat.

Then...like the masochist I am, I have to go and check the weather in my old hometown of Long Beach, CA: 77, 78, 76, 74, etc. All temperatures in the 70's. I once again question my logic of moving to Texas. It may be cheaper to live here, and the traffic isn't as bad, and there are definitely less phonies trying to sell screenplays, but man, the weather is brutal here.

Since I now work part time instead of full time, I find myself with more free time to do things with the kids. Simple things like a walk in the neighborhood or a trip to the local park are an impossibility. Just a short trip to the mailbox can result in third degree burns. Our latest family trip consisted of going to see a movie (a free showing of "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs" at the Alamo Drafthouse), followed by a pretzel at the local mall, followed by a trip to Target to buy more crap. All indoor activities, because that's all you can pretty much do during the summer in Texas. Stay indoors until about late September/early October, when temperatures finally reach a level when you can walk outside without suffering heatstroke.

This weather makes me long for the Texas winter, so I can then complain about how friggin' cold it is. But right now, 29 degrees sounds pretty good.

I Like Obama, But He Sucks as President

I try to avoid the news as much as possible lately. The more I read or watch, the more depressing it is, and the more I lose faith in this country.

Here we have our elected president, Barack Obama, a supposedly "liberal" Democrat, failing us at every turn. This debt-ceiling deal fiasco is just another failure. Obama caved in once again to the Republicans, keeping all the Bush tax-cuts for the rich, while agreeing to huge spending cuts that will hurt the most in need (the unemployed, people facing foreclosure, the poor, etc.). It also seems likely that deep cuts will be made on environmental programs, so clean air and water will soon be a thing of the past.

To give Obama a little credit, I realize that he is up against the most radical and extreme GOP that I've ever seen. This isn't the first time the GOP has held the country hostage with their demands. I think they would rather see the country go bankrupt than give up a single break for the top 1% of the country.

But, alas, Obama is a weak president. He's the wimp who doesn't stand up to the playground bully. He's the kid who gives up his lunch money when the bigger kid comes around and demands it. Rather than punch the kid in the nose, he just empties his pockets . 73% of the country want Obama to raise taxes on the rich, yet he still doesn't do it. So sad. How would Hillary Clinton have handled this? Frankly, I think she's got far more balls than Obama. I am now certain she would have made a better president.

If another Democrat came forward to challenge Obama, I would support them whole-heartedly. It doesn't seem likely, though, which makes for a very depressing 2012.

(Picture: When you see Mitch McConnell this happy, you know we're fucked.)

France and England 2000, Saved from the Rodents of Taiwan

From 1992 to 2002, basically the length of my first marriage, I took tons and tons of pictures. These weren't digital pictures. These were actual, physical pictures shot on actual film. Most of those were of my ex-wife and places we had gone together. When I left for Taiwan in 2004, I left all those pictures with my brother. Since I soon realized my brother would probably end up destroying those pictures, I took them back to Taiwan with me at the end of 2004.

So, when we moved back to America in 2008, I had no room to bring any of those pictures back with me. It wasn't a top priority at that time, anyway. It was another time, an ex-wife. Did I really want to spend a lot of time ruminating on my past life? Not really. But I did have a lot of pictures from places such as France, England, and New York City (pre 9/11) that I wanted to recover. I put everything into envelopes, and then into boxes, and hoped they'd be preserved in Taiwan until the day came when I could retrieve them.

Well, I did finally retrieve them when I returned this summer, but they weren't actually in the condition I was hoping for. It seemed Christy's mother got bored one day, opened all my pictures to look at them, and put them back into the box, uncovered. The box was placed into a rather dirty storage area, where all manner of animals and insects had a feast on them. With a pair of gloves, I went through what was salvageable, and discarded the rest. I probably saved about 15%. Some of my favorite photos (pictures of the Eiffel Tower, pictures of me crossing the famous "Abbey Road", pictures from the top of the World Trade Center.....all gone. Here's some of what remains. A few pictures from the summer of 2000, when life was more carefree, and I spent my summer in Paris and London. You'll see me in the some of pictures, as well as Amber (my ex-wife). I'll post the few pics I have from NYC later.

(The pictures were scanned, so they look pretty small. Just click on them to make it bigger.)

A Few Final Pictures from the Trip

(Pictures: 1. Our first night in Taiwan, at a hotel in Taoyuan. 2 & 3: Sara and Kyle pose at a temple. 4. A street in JuShan. 5. My mother in-law's backyard, which is basically the open jungle. 6. My mother in-law, who doesn't really like to have her picture taken. 7. Downtown Taoyuan. 8. Arriving at the airport in Japan. Unfortunately, that's the only part of Japan we saw. 9. Downtown JuShan. 10. David with his long-time girlfriend (and now, finally, wife), Pi Chi.)

More Pictures From Bangkok