Reviews and Response

I've been told by more than one person not to respond directly to any of my reviews on Amazon.  It's considered tacky and beneath the writer to do such a thing, even when it's just to thank someone for a good review.  However, no one has ever said it's tacky to respond on your personal blog...so here we are, and I've decided to share a few of my reviews with you, my loyal readers.  I'll also give my response.

Contrary to what you might think, this isn't going to be a congratulatory, pat yourself on the back promotional blog where I commend myself for all my stellar reviews.  I'm going to focus particularly on the negative reviews, of which I've had a few.

I currently have six books for sale on Amazon (one just released yesterday).  To date, I have received 28 reviews on those books.  Of those 28, I received 23 good reviews and 5 bad ones.  One of those five bad reviews was particularly scathing, and was more of a personal attack.  So...my average has been pretty good, but any writer who says he doesn't care about his negative reviews is probably lying.  I guess when you're someone like Stephen King, you don't really give a shit anymore; you have your loyal audience and you've made your fortune.  But those of us who are just starting to get our feet wet in the literary world, we take our reviews (at least somewhat) seriously.

I know that eventually I'm going to get bad reviews.  Every writer does.  Look at the reviews for Stephen King's "Kindle Exclusive" book called "UR."  Terrible.  Even "Hamlet" by Shakespeare has bad reviews, as my friend David pointed out in his rather amusing blog post yesterday.  What I find annoying are that my bad reviews tend to say absolutely nothing and are almost always very poorly written.

Here are my two "1 Star" reviews.  The first one is for my first fiction book, "Interstate 10"

Worse book I have read in ages!
By Johnny-Teague Ross

i just didn't care for this book, the story line was confusing and since i live off i10 i found it to be a little disturbing!    I love a good mystery but this one just doesn't do it for me!

Where do I begin with this one?  First off, I never labeled this book as a "mystery."  It's labeled under "horror" and "supernatural."  Did this guy even read the description?  As a horror writer, if you say that something I wrote was "disturbing," that's actually a compliment.  That's what horror writers want..for YOU to be disturbed.  And you didn't like it because you live near Interstate 10?   Are you serious?  By your logic, I should hate every book that takes place in Texas because I live here.

Here's the other "1 Star" review.  This one is for my second fiction book, "Small Town Evil""

Worse book I have ever read!

By Wendy Zierk

This was THE worse book I have ever read. This. Could have been written by an elementary school student.  Total waste of money.

Are you noticing a pattern here?  Why do my harshest critics not know the difference between "worse" and "worst?"  Her "elementary school" comment would have had more effect if she herself didn't come across as illiterate.  I have some suspicion that this review could be fake, since her account is brand new and my book is the only book she has reviewed.  If my book is the "worse" book she has ever read, clearly she has not read "Desire of Love to Handsome" by Rizzy.

My other negative reviews aren't nearly this bad.  Most of them are actually positive, but the readers are complaining that they are too short.  All I can say is...THEY'RE SHORT STORIES.  They aren't novels.  If I write a novel, I will definitely not be selling it for only 99 cents.  If these negative reviews are as bad as it's going to get, I'm not too worried.  I think the negative review I fear the most is the one that is very well written and takes my story apart piece by piece and explains why they think it sucks.  But at least with that kind of review, you can use the criticism as a tool to help you improve the next time.  These troll reviews, though, are just lame.

My new book, "THE DEAD ONES", out today!

After taking a couple of months break from writing, I have returned with my latest book "THE DEAD ONES" which is now on sale at Amazon for 99 cents.  This one is sort of a prequel to my first fiction book, "Interstate 10" so if you liked that one you would probably like this one too.

My previous book, "Small Town Evil" has been doing insanely well.  It went on the Amazon best seller list shortly after I published it, getting as high as #16, and it's still on there today (today it's at #28).  I don't know what the secret was with that story, but it surprises me as much as it probably surprises you.

You can buy my latest book by clicking on this link.

FREE MUSIC DOWNLOAD - "Party Like P Diddy" by Mac Peelo

If you like rap and hip-hop music, here's a song you can download (or stream) for FREE.  Everyone loves free music, right?  The artist's name is Mac Peelo and the song is called "Party Like P Diddy."  It's on KV Records.

You can download or stream it by clicking on this link.

You can also go to the artist website here and watch a video of the artist making the song.  Feel free to comment below to let them know what you think of the song.

Tactical Vantage - For all your gun needs!

If you love guns, here's a great website to visit, Tactical Vantage!  They carry the following items:

Firearm accessories and parts
Replacement stocks
Gun magazines and clips
Tactical rifle accessories
Tactical shotgun accessories
California legal magazines
and more!

This is THE website to visit for all your gun needs.  Who doesn't love guns?  Here in Texas, even the liberals love guns, so why not buy all this stuff before Obama takes it all away?  Okay, he probably won't take any of it away, but why take chances, right?

Here is the link to their website.

Video - Eric Clapton - Crossroads (3/17/2013)

Eric Clapton performing "Crossroads" at the Frank Erwin Center in Austin on 3/17/2013.

Eric Clapton in Austin!

Eric Clapton came to Austin on Sunday night, and since I had never seen him live in concert before, I decided to check him out.  He's always been on my "concert bucket list" but for some reason, during my prime concert-going years (the 90's), I wasn't that big of a fan enough to see him.  I always thought he was a great guitar player, and the work he's done with The Yardbirds, Cream, Derek and the Dominos, Blind Faith and especially on Roger Waters first solo album (The Pros and Cons of Hitchhiking) is very impressive.  For some reason though, I just never really got into his solo stuff.  But...times change, people get older and more mellow, and now I find myself liking a lot of stuff that I would never have listened to 20 years ago.

The 2 hour show Sunday at the Frank Erwin Center was mostly filled with 70's classics (Lay Down Sally, Wonderful Tonight, I Shot the Sheriff, Cocaine) and old Robert Johnson blues numbers (Crossroads, Love in Vain, Stones in My Passway, Little Queen of Spades.)  Clapton does have a brand new album out (Old Sock), but I don't think he did a single song from it, not that anyone would have cared.  This was an audience that just wanted to relive the 70's.  I was too young to have seen Clapton in the 70's, but I've heard many of his live recordings from that time, and I was hoping to see some of that guitar wizardry on display.  Clapton has still got it, and his solos on songs like "Got to Get Better in a Little While" and "I Shot the Sheriff" were incredible.  However, there were many times when he let his other guitarist, Doyle Bramhall, take the lead.  Actually, too many times in my opinion.  It almost seemed like Clapton was just trying to pass the torch to the new guy.  He also let his keyboard player (Paul Carrack) take lead vocals a few too many times as well (is "Tempted" the only hit Paul Carrack ever wrote?)

Still, these were only minor complaints compared to my biggest complaint of the night.  The Clapton signature tune "Layla" was played in the horrendous, unplugged lounge version made famous from his "Unplugged" album.  I hate that version and I was really hoping to hear it in its original, electric form.  No such luck.  However, from what I have seen on YouTube, he played the electric version on the first night of his tour, then when he hit Houston, he didn't play it all (imagine how pissed off those fans must have been.)  For Austin, though, we got "Layla", albeit the tepid version.

Clapton has said that this tour would likely be his last.  Not because he doesn't enjoy playing live, but because he doesn't like airports and going through security.  You'd like after 40 years of playing and touring he'd be used to it by now.  I'm lucky I had the chance to see him.

David's Review of "An American Teacher in Taiwan"

Now that my books have been out for a few months on Amazon, and some of them are selling fairly well, the reviews are starting to come in.  Someone I know told me that I shouldn't respond to them, especially the negative ones, since it looks tacky, so I haven't.  Well...maybe I'll respond here on the blog, but not on Amazon.  I did receive my first bad review a couple of weeks ago for "Interstate 10" where the reviewer said it was the "worse book I have read in ages."  He then goes on to say that it was "too disturbing" and that  he couldn't follow the plot, and he didn't like it because he "lives near Interstate 10."  It's probably the dumbest review I've ever read...but what can you do?

Amazon seems to have this crazy policy where you have to actually buy the product that you are reviewing, or else they won't publish your review, so I'm going to publish my friend David's (the one that lives in Taiwan) review.  He's read the book, but didn't buy it.  It seems to be a positive review, but written in his typical style.  Anyway, here it is, and you can also read it on his own personal blog:

"An American Teacher In Taiwan” by Ken Berglund is based on the famous blog of the same title and author. It is advertised as a guide to teaching English in Taiwan. I feel this part is misleading as much has changed since the author escaped to his homeland. Even if the labyrinth of Chinese bureaucracy was somehow the same today as it was five years ago, or even five months ago, no single person can give anyone a comprehensive view of the horrors that await them should they feel the need to follow in his footsteps. The arbitrary rules and regulations change from person to person and are enforced at whim.

However, this e-book is also advertised as “One writer’s experience about living, working, dating, finding love, and raising kids in a foreign country.” As a personal memoir, I cannot question its veracity. I can only confirm that many of the obstacles in adapting to life in a Chinese culture that the author experienced are universal to any American, or possibly even Canadian, in similar circumstances.

Mr Berglund relates an incident wherein he is induced to enter a “special” KTV by women of liberal morals and is only able to leave the establishment after forfeiting an unacceptably large sum of cash. Any robust red blooded male who has set foot in any Chinese country for more than twelve hours can relate to this situation.

If you want to know what kind of paperwork you must fill out and have stamped in triplicate to live in the Land of Scooter, this book will not help you. If you want to know what the people are like and how different their customs are from your own, this book covers a broad range of expatriate topics.

Some would say its range of topics is too broad. A guide to living in a foreign land or a travel guide should have a more narrow focus. But as a memoir, there is an even balance between personal insights (the part about his erectile dysfunction brought on by too many betel nuts) and general anecdotes (Chinamen be wacky). For this reason among others, I think this should be marketed as a memoir and not any kind of handbook.

While this e-book is probably more interesting to Americans who have lived or are now living in a foreign country, it is written in such a casual narrative that even a xenophobe who has never set foot outside of Itawamba, Mississippi might find it enjoyable.

I give it five muffins.